Inspiring words. What are they?
What I want to talk about today is basically how you talk to yourself. Everybody has a stream of dialogue running through their head that, pretty much, determines their day, if not their life. What’s yours? Do you speak to yourself with inspiring words, or do you constantly berate yourself?
If you affirm ‘I am an abundant person’, ten times in the morning (an excellent idea by the way), but then proceed to worry about your financial situation for the rest of the day you are unlikely to see any positive change. This is known as cognitive incongruity. The mind can get infected with what I call porous thoughts (thoughts that leak away our energy), such as, ‘I can’t seem to make enough money’, ‘why does this always happen to me’, ‘how come I never had what my friend Charlie had?’, that kind of thing. And this continuous drip-drip self talk really puts your positive affirmations or inspiring words on low heat.
Are they the panacea of mind control or not ?
Affirmations are positive statements, of good intent, designed to change a habit or manifest something we want in life.
They probably began in the modern era with Emile Coue’s now famous saying, ‘every day in every way I’m getting better and better’, a statement that many have claimed changed their lives. Affirmations are huge in New Age circles, and while I don’t wish to discourage anyone from using them, I don’t entirely rely on them myself.
If you are going to use affirmations the advice is to remember the three Ps
personal, positive, and present tense.
We will examine these in turn:
First up, affirmations are about you, not somebody else. For example, if you want to find love you would say,
I now attract the perfect mate into my life.
Not,
Suzi Watson down at no. 23 will fall madly in love with me.
(it’s such a mystery she hasn’t already!)
The latter is entering someone else’s energy space. For starters you don’t have a right, and on a practical level it probably won’t work because Suzi Watson is on her own life path, and this isn’t going to change just because you’d like it to.
I now enjoy a healthy lifestyle, and daily exercise.
Not,
I'm going to get rid of my fat belly and big bum.
The second statement makes you think of yourself in a disparaging way. Focus instead on being fit and healthy.
I am now becoming rich and successful doing what I love.
Not
I will become rich and successful doing what I love.
When? tomorrow, next week? Never? The latter gives your brain a let out clause.
I am is probably the greatest statement you could ever proclaim. However, if your goal is still a bit off it may be better to hold back on it. For example, if you say ‘I am a millionaire’ every morning, and you have a pile of unpaid bills lying on the table, then, it’s probably unbelievable.
‘I am becoming’, is better, even if it is slightly future tense.
It’s always best to use what the mind can accept.
Therefore, you could say,
I’m on my way to becoming a millionaire.
Or
every day I take a step closer to my goal of financial independence.
I like that.
The general advice is to avoid the word ‘not’ in an affirmation.
Listen to this
My goal is to make $100,000 this year and I will succeed.
Instead of
My goal is to make $100,000 this year and I will not fail.
The argument here is that the brain doesn’t register the word ‘not’, therefore
it reads the second sentence as ‘My goal is to make $100,000 this year and I will fail’.
I have a bit of a problem with this one, however, I bow to more experienced teachers in this field. Like I said affirmations are not really my thing. However, my objection is what about the many times we were told:
"you will never amount to anything", or,
"I cannot do this".
If the orthodox teaching on affirmations is correct then the mind should hear "you will amount to [some]thing", and, "I can do this". Right?
Definitely food for thought. However, if affirmations are your thing no harm in following the tried and tested path.
Just avoid getting ‘knotted!’ (sorry!)
Well, you'll find hundreds of ready-made affirmations in any self-help book, although it’s best to come up with your own. After all, these address your specific wants and needs.
(yes, do!!)
People use affirmations in different ways. Some say them in the morning and
again before going to bed. Saying them aloud while standing in front of a mirror is
recommended.
Personally I don’t use affirmations often, but when I do, the method I prefer is to let the new thought repeat over and over in the back of my head, like a tape almost, saturating my mind until I have no other thought in it.
Keep the sentence short and snappy for this method.
If your affirmations target a specific goal make sure it’s realistic, congruent with your values, and doable.
I’m going to win the lottery by next Tuesday probably doesn’t fall into any of the above.
Sometimes general affirmations work better than specific ones. Emile Coue is a good example of what I mean. It doesn’t demand a specific outcome. It’s not time sensitive. You’re not thinking, ‘when is this going to show up in my life’. It allows the Universe to give you your good as it sees fit. Detach yourself from the outcome. If it’s not in your path you won’t manifest it anyway.
It is recommended you write out affirmations. When we put something down on paper we’re making a commitment. And don’t worry about how they will come about. When it comes to manifesting the important thing is allowing, allowing it to come to you. This is the part people have most difficulty with. We can ask, we can pray, they can demand, but often we won’t allow ourselves to receive.
Some people use a response column. The way to do this is take a page and
draw a line down the centre of it. Write the affirmation on one side, and on
the other side put down the first feeling or ‘reaction’ that comes up. If the
statement is, ‘my goal is to make $100,000 this year’, your first reaction may
be, ‘rubbish, I never made anything near that’. Then write out the statement
again, followed by a new response.
The theory, at least, goes that eventually you will get to, ‘well, maybe’. Then
eventually, ‘okay’, and finally, ‘Yippee! I can do it.’
Personally, I never found this method any use. I think it’s a recipe for fighting with yourself. But it works for some.
Emm? I’m glad you asked. You can invert a negative script such as low self esteem with
I am now brimming with confidence.
Now I’m not entirely comfortable with this approach to erasing deeply held patterns and scripts. There usually needs to be some work done on those as well. Sometimes there’s a tendency to sugar over a problem with a nice affirmation, and that’s not good.
On the USS we advocate getting unscripted, but then I would say that! So I’d try a bit of this, or even a little piece of that, or, if you want to go really mad how about a bit of the other! Wow!
Confusing?
I always love to finish a visualisation (or affirmation) session with the following:
“This, or something greater
Will now come about.
In an easy and relaxed manner,
In a healthy and positive way,
In its own perfect time,
For the highest good of all.”
I think it originated with Catherine Ponder, although I could be mistaken, so if I’m wrong hit me on contact us.
Make your inspiring words your highest intention.
There is a voice that doesn’t use words - listen!
Rumi
Reality is merely an illusion - albeit a persistent one.
Albert Einstein